"I just wished someone had a crystal ball, so they could tell me everything was going to be ok. I wanted guarantees, I wanted assurances, but I knew no one could give them to me, and that was incredibly frightening. In my local Sands group there were a couple of mothers who had had healthy babies after their loss and they understood how I was feeling – that really helped.” – Hannah 

You may find deciding when and if to have another baby incredibly difficult and confusing. Some parents choose to wait until they are through their initial period of mourning, often a year, while others decide to get pregnant immediately. It is a very personal decision and all parents approach the situation differently. 

If you become pregnant again, you will naturally be anxious about the outcome. It is normal to feel fear and worry that this baby may die too. You may find yourself unable to imagine a future where you’ll be able to see and hold your healthy baby. You may have difficulty bonding with this new baby during your pregnancy. Your thoughts may instead turn to planning a funeral. 

Everyone experiences different anxieties and has their own way of coping. You might feel guilty about not enjoying being pregnant, or the opposite - guilty for enjoying it. Don’t feel like you have to justify your feelings to anyone. 

We know how lonely and isolating pregnancy after loss can feel and how difficult it can be to find your ‘tribe’ who understand what you’re going through. 

We have a private Facebook group especially for pregnancy after loss, whether you're thinking about or trying to conceive or are already pregnant. Please email Services with your request to join this supportive group.

Download our Planning Another Pregnancy factsheet

Contact a Parent supporter