‘I was healthy and not expecting any abnormal results. It was such a shock to be told my baby had no chance of survival.’ Betty 

Learning about a serious abnormality with an unborn baby almost always comes as a shock. Most parents are unprepared for the emotional conflicts that will follows. Most will struggle with the decision of what comes next. 

You may be wondering how you will cope, how your decision will impact your family, and what you will tell others. 

Feelings of shock, disbelief, confusion, distress, guilt, and self-blame are common. 

It’s important to give yourself time to absorb the news and fully comprehend the range of possible outcomes for your baby and how these may affect you and your family. 

Whether you decide to continue or terminate the pregnancy, your decision is valid. No one can make this choice for you. You must be guided by your own values. 

Sands can provide you with non-judgemental support and put you in touch with other parents who have gone through a similar experience. 

Our parent supporters acknowledge the close bond that can form between parents and their expected baby, even at early gestations, and understand the intense grief you may be feeling. Their understanding and support can make a big difference. 

Our Medical Termination fact sheet outlines your pregnancy options after diagnosis, the legal rights and requirements governing medical termination, as well as important information on how to cope after your pregnancy has ended, including advice on how to spend time with or make memories of your baby where possible. 

Download our Terminating Pregnancy for Medical Reasons factsheet

Contact a parent supporter